This is the story of a client of mine. Let’s call her Mary. This, of course, is not her real name. Mary is a 54-year-old high school teacher living with her husband in a calm and friendly neighbourhood. Mary’s neighbours like her cheerful welcoming spirit as they greet her every morning on their way to work. Yet, Mary’s life is not as easy as it looks from the outside.
One night, the serene neighbourhood was disturbed by the sound of the ambulance at 2:00 am. Mary was rushed to the hospital with sharp pain in her chest. She was admitted immediately to the operating room for coronary bypass surgery.
If we take a closer look at Mary’s life, we will understand the source of her ‘broken’ heart. Mary is a caring loving wife. She spent the last 15 years of her marriage nurturing her husband who suffered from bipolar disorder. Her husband chronic health problems drained her energy and isolated her from any form of social life.
Mary drew a nice smile on her face every morning while her heart was bleeding and her energy was draining. She loved her husband despites his endless fits. Still, she needed to be loved and nurtured in return. Her heart longed for its missing source of energy. And, as she ignored her Body Whispers for years, they shouted louder and louder until they turned into screams.
Mary’s operation was a wake-up call. Her life was at stake and she needed to do some changes. Many times, we cannot change our environment or circumstances, but we sure can change our perceptions, beliefs and choices and these are what matter the most.
As I helped Mary change her diet, manage her stress and choose a healthy lifestyle. I also helped her heal her heart, which is the crucial factor in her healing journey.
She needed to ditch the victimhood mentality and proceeded to embrace life with all its ups and downs. She also learned to add joys into her everyday existence; she re-engaged with her community and chose to embrace her experience with grace and gratitude not helplessness and despair.
And, as she added little pleasures, excitements and joys into her life, she no longer needed fats and sweets as her emotional comfort. She learned to nurture her heart and soul and properly nourish her body and feed her mind.
With an uplifted spirit and regained stamina, Mary now had more energy to take better care of her husband and give him the love and support he needed. Not, surprisingly, this amazing change in her personality and temper was soon reflected on his behaviour and the bipolar cycling pattern was greatly reduced. When he was in his depressive/down state, Mary had the energy to give him the care and love he needed and when he was in his grandiose/ manic phase, she now had the patience and tolerance to embrace the experience.
Mary’s story is one of tens I meet every day. The story may change, but the underlying pattern is always the same… LISTEN. Deep inside, your heart knows what it really needs. All you have to do is listen!
When we talk about heart energy, love and care, we take it abstractly, we just don’t really feel it. Our modern society taught us that if it is not seen, touched or heard than it does not exist. If science didn’t prove it, then it can’t be true… Well, science has proven it, but yet it cannot explain it.
All traditional cultures emphasized the role of the heart in the human spiritual journey. Now science is starting to acknowledge the heart as more than a mere pump that delivers blood to our organs.
There is no better time in history for us to remind ourselves of the crucial need for us to heal our hearts.
We now know that love, care, peace, and forgiveness can physically heal while anger, grudge and hatred can precipitate bodily illness. We know that fear, stress and worry compromise our immunity and alter our physiology.
This is my invitation to all of us to start restoring love and care in our hearts so that we can restore health to our bodies and peace to our planet.